Okay, this may seem like a weird question but... I am pregnant with my second child, my son is 2 1/2, I am feeling this guilt though, like I wont be able to give him all of the attention he needs when the new baby comes, I really feel bad! This baby is whole heartedly wanted, but I can't help feeling a little sad that our "perfect" little family will soon be coming to an end, and things will be forever changed. I also can't imagine loving anthing/one as much as my son. Are these feelings normal for a mom expecting her second child? If anyone can relate please advise!! - Jessica
Answer
I went through the EXACT same guilty feelings while pregnant with my second son. I guess we all wonder if we can ever experience the tremendous love we have for our firstborn again, for one thing. And you worry if you will have enough time for your older son. Well, it all seems to work out ok. You might make some special time for your older son at first, but it's not too difficult since newborns sleep so much. And, I also made sure to involve my oldest son with the baby a bit; I let him "help" with changing the diapers, let him sit by me while I breast-fed his baby brother, etc.
Anyway, it's been a wonderful experience to see the bond that has developed between those two over the years. They are 11 and almost 9 now, and over-all they get along really well. - Barb
YES YES YES! Connor turned 2 just 5 days after Quinn was born. I had the same feelings, but it all worked out. You can have enough love for them all! I agree you should try to involve your son. Connor just adores Quinn, and you should see Quinn's face light up when Connor plays near him and shows him how to crash his cars. And Connor thinks it's his job to throw away the wet diapers (not the dirty ones, though, that's just asking for trouble!) - Poohka
These feelings are normal, although I didn't know that at the time. My sister told me she had these same feelings with her second, hers are 15 months apart. I thought I was some freak of nature and it meant that subconsciously I didn't want the baby or something. It didn't. I think, and this may come out sounding worse than I mean it, but I think that it's easier to think of the effects of the child you already have than the one you're pregnant with. You really know this child, all their moods, attitudes, schedules, things like that. And of course that doesn't mean you don't care about the baby you're carrying, we know you do, it's just easier to worry about someone already living outside of the womb. - Paula
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