1. Parenting

Taking Time For Yourself

Mom Burn Out

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Being a full-time parent is very demanding and we all risk burn out at times. Guest author Rosalind Mays talks about the importance of busy parents taking some time out for themselves.

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"I Got To Be Me!", by Rosalind Mays

I do a lot of stuff. My family thinks I'm crazy and my friends sadly shake their heads with pity in their eyes. Their concerns are well founded; I do way too much. I'm an author and a tireless promoter of my work. I'm part owner of a secretarial support service. I'm a stay at home mother of three children (ages 6, 4 and 2) and if that's not all, I have a telecommuting job as an Internet Researcher.

You can hear the gasps when I recite the above passage in response to the question: "what do you do?" Those that don't gasp look at each other and say through silent telepathic voices, "super woman complex". A concerned psychologist friend constantly inquires about the health of my marriage, my relationship with my kids and my self-esteem. Others just simply blurt out what everyone else is thinking, "when do you have any time to do anything right?"

The answer to that question is simply, "I don't know, I just juggle everything well I guess." But here lies the key to my juggling act. You see, I can give stay-at-home parents loads of advice about creating schedules to work around kids, organizing their work for optimum effectiveness and efficiency, multi-tasking tips and so on. But there is one key that helps me do all the stuff I need to do and remain sane. I don't hear about it often, it's called . . .ME TIME.

Yes you heard me correctly. I'm talking about rejuvenation time, quiet time, alone time, personal time, self-care . . . ME TIME!

Two times a week, I drive away from my adoring husband, three little bright and loving faces, and a messy house. I leave my neighborhood and suddenly, I'm not a wife, a mother, a housekeeper, author, business owner, assistant, daughter, sister or employee . . . I'm just Roz. I'm just me and for 4 hours I can go where I want to go and do what I want to do.

Answer this. When was the last time you were just "you?" Not recently I bet.

What do I do in my 4 hours? Lots of stuff. I can rent a hot tub and soak for an hour. I can go to a bookstore, grab a juicy novel and sit in a big comfy chair until I finish or until the bookstore closes (whichever comes first). I can park by the water and watch the sunset. I can go to Denny's and ask for the most fattening platter on the menu. I can go to a movie and order the biggest tub of popcorn and a box of Junior Mints. I can go to the park and ride on the swings. I can go to the gym and watch big muscular men workout. I can drive far, far, away very slowly and look at the scenery.

The possibilities and the destinations are endless. I meet people and talk to them and I'm just "ME". I can be myself and not think about the dirty sink or the smelly diaper or the crazy client.

It's a wonderful feeling, but most of all it clears the mind. It allows me to sort things out. New ideas, solutions to old problems, and other wonderful things pop into my mind as soon as silence surrounds me.

Try it, I dare you! But let me warn you, after you try it you'll never be able to live without it!

Copyright 2000 Rosalind Mays. All Rights Reserved.

Rosalind Mays, best-selling author of The Real Deal on Telecommuting, and co-author of "Get Your Money Back! Stop Scammers and Save Your Dollars," works at home as an Internet Researcher. She hopes her advice and report (which compiles all the information she found while searching for her current job) will shorten other job seeker's time in finding legitimate work at home opportunities. Visit http://telecommuting.cjb.net for a free list of telecommuting jobs compiled monthly. Go to: http://www.siennapublishing.com to learn more about her books. She may be reached via e-mail RozMW@aol.com.

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